Happy birthday Betty 2

It's Betty 2s birthday and the nice Government has given Paddock Workers a day off. It isn't really Betty 2's birthday, but the nice Government thought we had too many holidays at the start of the year and wanted to get one into the later part of the year. Hang on, that's Betty 1 in the picture - or is it Helen Mirren? Royal families can be confusing. Anyway, Betty 2 was crowned Queen Betty on 2nd June 1953. I was born on 14th July 1953. This was very inconvenient for my dear old Mum as she was a froggy and wanted to go out dancing and boozing on July 14th to celebrate the day the Frenchies decided they didn't like their Government. So when I was a boy, my dear old Mum tricked me into thinking my birthday was the 2nd June and I was born on Betty 2's crowning day.

There, that's a better pic. Hang on, it's Helen Mirren again. Oh well, I always had a thing for Helen. Anyway, I finally caught my dear old Mum out as not only did she tell me I was born on the 2nd of June, she also told me I was born under the same star sign as my dear old Dad who was a Leo. 2nd June and Leo was not a match, so I gave her a grilling and elicited the truth at last. It just goes to show that everyone is out to fool you. Betty 2 was born on 21st April, not the first Monday in October as the Government would have you believe. My tip is to only ever trust Wiki and me.

Mulberry Season

 Mulberry Season has happened at the house paddock. There is now a 2 week window of opportunity to get as many Mulberries as I can - then the tree will grow like crazy and can only be controlled by hard pruning four times a day. Don't ever be tempted to buy a Mulberry tree. If you want one, just cut a bit off mine and stick it in the ground. You will have a tree in no time. Caring for your Mulberry tree is easy. Ignore it. I have found five uses for the Mulberry tree. Jam, Pie, feeding the Dear Little Chaps silkworms, tempting the cow to the bails (cows love Mulberry leaves) and mulch, mulch, mulch.
I know what's worrying you - what about the evil dicky birds knocking off your fruit? - you ask. Don't worry. For some reason they only knock off the fruit that grows above my head height. This means, I don't need a step ladder to fall off and there are plenty of Mulberries at my height to feed the humans. Now that my first harvest is in, will it be jam or pie?

Noisy Miner

No, they haven't started fracking the paddock, a Noisy Miner is a dicky bird.

These are very common around the paddock as they are a species that has benefited from human development. They like the types of plants humans tend to like and grow. They hang around in organised mobs, terrorising smaller dicky birds and ganging up on bigger dickies.
Don't be looking out for elaborate mating rituals - they're into occasional orgies for reproduction. There is also a very good and hopefully self explanatory reason they are called noisy. 

Bay Laurel tree in a pot

The Responsible Adult recently took me to our favorite Organic Store which also has a fancy Organic Cafe attached that sells fancy herb seedlings and plants.
I took a fancy to a Bay tree which was $8.95. Shocking, I know - I could have had a bottle of not fancy, but passable Shiraz for that. But there was a Bay tree in the home paddock when we moved here. It died soon after and ever since, I have wanted another one. So I used the Magic Plastic Card and have brought it home. According to Google, it will grow well in a pot in full sun or partial shade. It needs frequent watering as it is shallow rooted and should be pruned in spring. My normal fertiliser routine with fish emulsion should keep it happily fed.

Winners are Grinners

Nearly wasn't going to post today. Not because I'm not doing anything - still digging holes and mixing cement. It's just that the retaining wall job is going to go on for a while yet. Anyway, I usually come up to the Cubby house at about 2pm when the Responsible Adult is amenable to working the coffee machine. Anyhow, today when I came up, she told me that I was the proud winner of four and a half kilo's of chocolate from the local IGA. Yep, I won a competition. Now here's a big tip from your Paddock Worker - Chocolate goes really well with Shiraz.

On the kindle Setting Free the Bears John Irving

So I came to John Irving late in life, starting with Last Night in Twisted River - a ripping yarn. Moved on to Hotel New Hampshire and the fabulous A Prayer for Owen Meany. Thought I might try his first novel published in 1968. This is one for the true fans. It is a bit rambling which is in the authors style, but without the interest that is strong in his later novels. As usual, there are stories within stories and people come to amusing but rather nasty ends, but the whole thing seems disjointed. Can't recommend, sorry and didn't find a particular quote for this that I liked. But here is a quote from the author that he uses regularly in interviews:

 "For 12 novels the last sentence has come first, and not even the punctuation has changed. From that last sentence I make my way in reverse through the plot, because there always is a plot—I love plot—to where I think the story should begin."

Bloody wildlife

So I am installing a Magnificent Retaining Wall at La Studio. Only about a quarter done and already my manly Paddock Worker biceps feel like steel. Anyway, as I was happily digging along, I saw a Dickie Bird dart into a hole in the dirt. A few seconds later, it was out again. A few minutes later it was back. So, I figure I have the rare spangled feathered timid tit wren or some bloody thing nesting where I want to excavate. 

What's a Paddock Worker to do? It was about then I started thinking on the old Builders Laborers Federation and immediately downed tools. I went straight up to the Responsible Adult and convinced her to have a couple of coldies with me. 

I have sent pics to Professor Mate who will hopefully identify this little bugger and let me know how to deal with the situation. I shall keep you posted.

The rear end of the Rough Faced Shag

The Front end of the Hoary Honeycreeper

  

My Nice Flowers

Before setting out for a few hours hard labour at La Studio yesterday, I took time to smell the bottlebrush (and Lillypillies and Grevillias). These are all native plants that I put around the home paddock over the years. The good thing about them is that you can plant them and then just ignore them. No need to talk to them or play music to them, they just mind their own business, grow and flower. Time saved by planting these stoic Aussie plants may then be spent lovingly serving the needs of the Responsible Adult - which all good Paddock Workers should do.

 

Buying Old Tools

But first, an update on yesterday's outing to the Junk Shop. Didn't happen. We got just down the road when the Responsible Adult got a text from her Good Mate offering a girly day out at the beach, shops and cafe's. Any reasonable Paddock Worker would obviously agree to giving up his day out under these circumstances, so the Responsible Adult had a day out playing and I got to spend a fun filled day mixing cement. Wahoo for me.

 You may already know that I buy my paddock tools second hand as the old ones seem to be much better than the new ones. How the planet got to this I don't know. But its not only paddock tools that may be purchased second hand but all sorts. You see there are these Old Boys who are giving up their suburban retreats in favour of Units, Town Houses, Grey Nomad Vans and even Old Boy retirement homes. When doing this, Old Boys also wish to exchange their tools for cash as their days of being Handy Men are over. Some Old Boys have particularly good tools and only want tiny bits of cash in return. So here's my new best tool a 14" Makita Compound Dropsaw. Wahoo. Look at that big old sleeper sitting there. The Makita will cut it like a chainsaw going through a birthday cake. 
It was a shame that the Old Boy didn't have a table bench for it so I bought a nice Chinese one from Bunnings. 
Anyway, it's Sunday morning and you know what that means - Weeding!! - O yes.

A lazy day

It's Saturday morning and I'm feeling a bit knackered. After a couple of days concreting in posts and building the new sleeper deck at La Studio, the body is weary. The Responsible Adult has 3 days off work and I will join in the non work fun for a while. So after cooking her bacon and eggy bread for breakfast, it's down to a bit of kindle time and then we're off to the junk shops. Weeds may grow for another day - they are on my hit list and will not escape.

 

Is it a conspiracy??

Yesterday was one of THOSE days. I try to avoid THOSE days, but they sometimes happen. Couldn't find a square. I have two that I inherited from Big Daddy but could not find one of them. Immediately blamed this on My Youngest who recently, under threat of torture, revealed that the secret location of my cordless drill was in the boot of his car. Then I took the trailer that Good Mate had lent me to get some sand, gravel and cement. As the load went in, the tyres went rather flat. Blamed this on Good Mate who surely should have checked the tyres before lending out his trailer. Then Responsible Adult turned up. She had irresponsibly left her lunch at home so I cooked her crispy bacon and eggy bread thus loosing valuable minutes away from concreting. I tell you, they're out to get me.
But, then again, the squares could have been mislaid by, well, me. The tool shed does need a good tidy up. I guess the Good Mate is not known for putting heavy loads in the trailer, so perhaps I could have checked the tyres first. And, it is always a pleasure to cook for Responsible Adult as she is my sweetie. So perhaps best to calm down and just proceed around or over those little irritable obstacles and get through the day one step at a time.
Just keep in mind that at 5pm, the cork will be out of the bottle of a nice Shiraz.

More on Non Weeding

A small load of rough mulch

My name's Prince and I use herbicide. It has been 4 days since I last sprayed. 
Some people around here consider that herbicide use is very, very bad. I do offer to stop using if they will come over and weed for me, but so far nobody has taken me up on that. Herbicides help me transform an area from weeds to garden with a view that eventually I won't be reliant on them. To help reduce my spraying I use mulch. Most afternoons, I prune around the house paddock and fill up the little trailer with cuttings. 

Rough mulch added to rainforest area

 These get dumped around rainforest trees. In a year or two, I will have a canopy to shade the ground and the vast bulk of weeds will stop coming through. The mulch will have rotted to improve the soil. The area will maintain itself with a minimal amount of hand weeding. 

Native Violets - great for keeping out weeds

Great if you're growing rainforest, but even small areas can be grown out to be weed free. The aim is to not garden on the basis of perpetual herbicide use, but to use herbicides sparingly as an aid to getting your paddock in order - then stop using.

If only it didn't taste so good with coke.

Volunteering - still

Christmas Morning 2005

So, the Maleny Neighbourhood Centre asked me to locate any images I could find on CD's and hard drives and organise them neatly in a file on the server. Who said volunteering wasn't fun?? At the same time, I've dug out a digital camera and its various components which had been carefully hidden in a wide range of cupboards to get it into a workable proposition. Anyway, while going through their photo's, I found one of this rather dashing looking Paddock Worker cooking eggs for the mob on Christmas morning 2005. The MNC started a tradition of providing a free Christmas breakky quite a few years ago. I've missed a couple, but wherever possible, I like to go and cook a couple of hundred eggs before wandering home for a beer in the paddock. Just noticed that: The shirt was a gift from Best Mate, the apron was a gift from Big Sis, the hat was loned to me by one of the mob .... do I ever buy clothing apparel and accessories? Perhaps not. 

Wahoo it's raining

It's been particularly dry the last few weeks which is great for Paddock Workers AND Responsible Adults. Paddock Workers get to pull out weeds and Responsible Adults can work on their tan - a real win/win situation. But even the Responsible Adult started commenting on the lack of green in the grass so I commenced on the secret Paddock Workers rain dancing.

Your starting point is car washing. Usually you only have to wash one car and the rain will come. This time, we had our Youngest wash both our cars, and his, then get his BFF around to wash his car too. None of those worked. So I said in a loud voice that I was going to mow and actually mowed all paddocks. Still no rain. Then I started digging holes to cement posts - didn't do it. Finally I made arrangements to borrow the Good Mates trailer so I could get some sand, gravel and cement. THAT did the trick. It's raining and I can't mix concrete in the rain. Wahoo!!!
I'm taking the Responsible Adult out for breakfast (and perhaps dropping into Bunnings while we're out)

On the Kindle - Ghost Road

So, I've come to the final of the Regeneration trilogy and Booker winning novel 'The Ghost Road'. It ends badly. But it wasn't a surprise - even a comedy like Blackadder finished badly when it portrayed the trenches in WW1. The book continues the exploration of sex/death/class in an era when European humans were ruled by obvious dickheads. Not totally certain things have changed that much - the dickheads continue to rule because stupidity is contagious. So, like its predecessors in the trilogy - not a cheery tale - graphic descriptions of the horrors at war - graphic descriptions of boy/boy sex - a gripping read, but point yourself towards a light comedy afterwards. Here's the quote:

 "Ghosts everywhere. Even the living were only ghosts in the making. You learned to ration your commitment to them."

Visitng the Markets

Every few months, I wander down to the Caboolture Markets. Best time to get there is about dawn. By breakfast time, it is hot and crowded. There certainly is plenty of stuff to buy there, but I go for the plants. Veg seedlings, trees, shrubs, flowers - whatever. Not everything is cheap, but there are plenty of bargains if you look closely. It's also a good place to buy fruit and veg, old tools that are still better than new tools. Bits of hardware and so on. What would sell like hot cakes is paddock slaves to plant all the things I bought, but nobody seems to have thought of that yet.

Repotting the Birds Nest Fern

We've had this little beauty for a long, long time. A large Birds Nest Fern should probably be repotted every 4 or 5 years. The new foliage grows on top of the old, so it starts to climb out of your container. After pulling it out of the old container, feel free to hack away at the bottom, cutting away the old dead stuff. An old bread knife is handy. You may also notice that my new basket has an extra liner - one size smaller than the basket - for a bit of added protection at the bottom.

 And there you go. A nice new bed for wandering carpet pythons.

Free plants

When we moved to the paddock, someone gave me a Clivia. It looked a bit like this.

After a few years, it looked like this. So I started to dig up the new ones and move them around. Now we have about 100.

 If only I could find a lipstick to match.

Well, well, well - 3 holes in the ground

Having moved the timber around the paddock (and increased the size of my manly muscles) its time dig some holes. These three likely looking holes were a breeze. Digging in nice soft red top soil with a crow bar and shovel is easy peasy. These 3 posts will finish the front fence at the house paddock. A job that I started about 10 years ago and never got round to finishing. It will soon be off the bucket list.

                                                                   
Not so easy digging at La Studio. The site had already been excavated to a depth of about a metre, so I'm digging in subsoil. The fossilised velociraptor bones are pretty jarring when I hit them with the crow bar. There's only a dozen or so of these holes to dig, so I tell myself that they will all be finished by Christmas. In the hole is a very simple depth guide. I want to build a 40cm high wall so the holes need to be 40cm deep at least to take an 80cm post. Oh well, hopefully I will have a very manly 6 pack by the time all these holes get installed.

The Playlist this week

Sigur Ros - yes it's those crazy kids from Iceland. Bit hard to describe. The singer is a male - maybe they like their undies particularly tight in Iceland. Anyway, you can't say they aren't cool.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1cZDhGK18zw&list=PL98EAEC14404263F4&index=9&feature=plpp_video

Client - still proving you don't need excessive talent to get onto the Princes' playlist. Thre hot chicks in tight red dresses with a great beat - does it for me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQjWJeGCMI0

Santana - the air guitarists hero. Made an album of covers recently. Particularly good version of Why My Guitar Gently Weeps. Not sure about the film clip, but enjoy the sounds.

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-5M1_DKvb0

Digging Holes

I'd rather be doing this

So the timbers all moved now comes the next bit of fun, fun, fun. I need to dig some nice big holes to install some posts. Installing timber posts is not a bit like facebook posts. Instead of a keyboard and monitor, you use a crow bar and shovel. And rather than exercising your fingers, you get to use all sorts of muscles - some you didn't even know you had till they start aching. But instead of the transient nature of facebook posts, your fence posts should last years and years.One thing you don't normally get with a fence post is likes or comments, but I may have a cunning plan to overcome this deficiency - stay tuned.

As for the picture, well the caption says it all. You too can be just like this. Give your responsible adult a good feed and a few glasses of a nice Shiraz and guide her to the comfy chair.

Whats on the Kindle - Cormac McCarthy

Hmmm, thought I'd have a break before finishing the Regeneration trilogy and turned to one of America's most respected authors. Well ....... it started off as a 3 guys out on a bar-be-que type story for the first third. As the likely lads cross from Texas to Mexico, one of them chats to the locals in Spanish (the book had no subtitles and I was too lazy to type it all into Google translate). It also takes a while to get used to the lack of punctuation, but it's no big deal.

From this ambling start comes the Cormac McCarthy touch of fairly nasty things happening to our heroes as they become victims of events. I found it a bit hard to believe when the main character - who appeared to be sparse in communication and language suddenly had a lengthy and lyrical philosophical epithany. 

I was pretty much over it by the end. Not a happy read - but it is Cormac McCarthy so it should get a quote:   “I can normally tell how intelligent a man is by how stupid he thinks I am.” 

I think there's something in that for all of us .........

Easy way to move timber

Some of the timber moved to La Studio

So I bought a big pile of timber to do various jobs around the Paddock. I asked that delivery be as close as possible to La Studio. For the truck driver, this was about 50 meters uphill of the site. And, to be extra helpful, the timber was all stacked on top of each other with the bits I need first carefully located at the bottom of the pile.

So I thought about how to move all this timber. After thinking for a month or two, I noticed that not once piece of timber had moved. So I decided to pick it up one piece at a time, start at the start and end at the end. It was a slow process, but at least I had time to notice all the weeds that need pulling out around La Studio.

Oddly enough, I slept really well this morning. 

Snakes Alive!

Frank the Carpet Python

Crikey! It's warmed up and I can't seem to step outside without tripping over a snake. The main species we get here are whip, tree, black and carpet. Occasionally we get brown and tiger snakes but I don't hang around for a positive ID on those. Frank is our generic name for large Carpet Pythons that hang around the house. They are pretty harmless for humans but nice and deadly for rats and (unfortunately) chooks. I lost my last two chooks to a fat old python. They can also be a bit annoying around your pot plants.

Bloody Frank mucking up my Orchid

 Anyway, apart from chook loss, it's handy to have a Python hanging around to tidy up the rodent population in an Eco-friendly, no mess manner. Frank has had family at the house paddock and raised a lovely bunch of baby snakes in recent years - so I guess there must be more than one Frank living here. Not sure - they all look the same to me.

Wisteria

Every summer, when the Wisteria is growing 3 meters an hour, and when its roots go all the way under the cubby house and throw up shoots the other side I sit on the verandah and plan its total destruction as a menace. But then I know it will look like this for two weeks every spring and so it stays. If you're ever tempted to take one home to your paddock - be warned - it will never cease in its quest to dominate the entire paddock. My tip is to be brutal. Never encourage it with fertiliser and show it the secateurs every week. An occasional flogging may help. 

Des and June's Orchids

Des and June grow and sell Orchids at our local Co-op between June and September each year. The Responsible Adult told me years ago that while she appreciates cut flowers, she does consider them to be a bit wasteful and would much prefer Shiraz and chocolate. From time to time then, I may purchase a flowering plant on the basis that we will get the nice flowers over and over. The problem with this theory, is that while I can usually get the plant to remain alive, they never seem to want to flower again. I've tried the Princely methods - talking to them nicely, talking to them not so nicely, playing Mozart to them as well as Death Metal, but nothing has worked for me.

So it was great when June phoned me last night and I had an opportunity to ask Des for some advice. Pretty simple really - keep them in a well ventilated spot with just a bit of sunlight each day and add slow release fertilser from time to time. I shall try this and report back. If it doesn't work, I may just take them back to Des with the advice that he should make it flower and sell it to me again next year.  

What's on the Kindle - More Pat Barker

Whew! Just finished the second of Pat Barker's Regeneration trilogy "The Eye in the Door". This book picks up pretty much where the last one left off. It continues an unsentimental account of Dr Rivers and his WW1 psychiatric patients. The author continues to hold nothing back when describing the horrors of the war. The character, Billy Prior, is extraordinarily complex, but in the hands of this novelist, his story rings true. This novel brings into focus events surrounding pacifists and homosexuals and for me continues to highlight the stupidity of the 'establishment'. 

Your quote: "Soldiers home on leave had to be given an good time; they mustn't be allowed to remember what they were going back to, and this gave everybody else a magnificent excuse for never thinking about it at all" 

Pottering about

Around the end of each month, I come up to the house paddock to do some maintenance on the pot plants. As it warms up, this will be increased to once a fortnight. It doesn't take long. Orchids, ferns and Palms get a sprinkle of slow release fertiliser and all other pots get a dose of liquid fertiliser - Charlie Carp. Doing this gives you lush green growth and promotes flowering. Each time I do this, I also look to re-pot a plant or two so that re-potting doesn't build up to be a big, nasty chore.

Your Prince's recommendation is to do this work in the late afternoon with a glass or two of Shiraz which makes the work much more pleasant. For those Paddock workers who prefer pot maintenance do be carried out at lunch time it is recommended to switch from Shiraz to Pinot Noir - your plants may not appreciate it, but you will. 

Volunteering

Maleny Neighbourhood Centre

Volunteering is something I've been doing for a long time. Not sure why. You get to meet a lot of people, feel like you're helping out.  The main thing I've learned over the years is to avoid committees - so these days I just look to do tasks.

Anyway I come into the Neighbourhood Centre on Mondays and Wednesdays. Started doing some IT work for them about a year ago, but then their cleaner left. It seemed to me that a good way for me to help them save a dollar was to take on the cleaning. So I do that twice a week and still play with a bit of IT. 

I've been hanging round with these guys on and off for about 15 years. Their purpose in life is helping people. Not a bad ambition. Anyway, here's an old pick I found in the office where we got the funding for the lovely building I now get to clean twice a week.

Howard, Carolyn, Anna and Me

Another before and after

What a lovely Fathers Day. All weeds were granted a stay of execution to mark the specialness of the day. The Responsible Adult and I went down to 'La Studio' and played for a while. Apart from that, I read and am now awaiting a dinner cooked by baby Ben and his main squeeze Marigold. So I thought I would reminisce with a before and after photo of the little gully at the bottom of the Paddock. 

The before (if you hadn't guessed)